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purplerabbits at 11:07pm on 28/04/2004 under rant/opinion
purplerabbits at 11:07pm on 28/04/2004 under rant/opinionThere is a good survey about your views on legal marriage up at http://www.freecfm.com/r/rjharding/questionnaire.cfm - it's for someone's dissertation and is quite well worded: though it only allows you to describe one of your relationships it does allow you to list the relationship as "open", is open for all genders and sexualities and has a "bisexual" box.
My answers turned into a fairly accurate summary of my views on marriage...
If you can/could marry your partner, would you?
No
I am opposed to legal marriage because I don't want to give the State a say in my relationship and for all the reasons stated below
Lesbian and gay couples should be treated the same as heterosexual couples in law?
Agree
Because it's right: the only difference between people's rights should depend on their circumstances (e.g. whether they cohabit a council house, whether they have kids) not on their sexuality or gender.
Legal rights and responsibilities are more important to me than what the legal recognition of same-sex relationships is called?
Agree
I think we should treat rights and responsibilies separately, not as an all or nothing package deal with optional confetti.
Couples should only get legal rights and responsibilities if they live together?
Disagree
You should be able to nominate who you chose to visit you in hospital, raise your children when you die, benefit from your pension etc, whether they are a partner or not, but only co-habitees should be able to inherit the right to stay in shared housing.
Lesbians and gay men will only get equality if we are able to marry?
Disagree
Marriage is an messy legal institution with an ugly history, it has never done anything for equality and it leaves the State able to change the conditions without consulting those who are already married or gaining their consent.
Lesbian and gay couples should be able to marry just like heterosexual couples?
Agree
Marriage should not exist in its current form, but it should be possible to sue religious institutions for discrimination in any non-legal marriages that continue, because it would be fun.
The name ‘marriage’ is unimportant to me?
Disagree
It has negative associations because of the institution's history and current form. I don't think we will be able to reclaim it for a long time (after its abolition).
Civil Unions are inferior to marriage?
Disagree
They lose some of the crap associated with marriage and that's good. I am yet to be convinced that they lose enough of it, though.
Legal recognition of lesbian and gay relationships is less important than being accepted in society?
Agree
We need legal equality in employment and housing law etc, but attitudes change slower and have more day to day effect
The name marriage is important for heterosexuals to accept lesbian and gay relationships?
Disagree
I see acceptance anyway for same and opposite sex unmarried couples. Those people who care about marriage[1] should be ignored until they grow up or die out.
No relationship should have legal rights and responsibilities attached to it?
Agree
You should be able to opt in to certain legal rights, but most relationship stuff is and should be independent of this.
Edit: [1] By which I mean people who find marriage necessary in order to respect other people's relationships, not necessarily people who care about their own marriage
My answers turned into a fairly accurate summary of my views on marriage...
If you can/could marry your partner, would you?
No
I am opposed to legal marriage because I don't want to give the State a say in my relationship and for all the reasons stated below
Lesbian and gay couples should be treated the same as heterosexual couples in law?
Agree
Because it's right: the only difference between people's rights should depend on their circumstances (e.g. whether they cohabit a council house, whether they have kids) not on their sexuality or gender.
Legal rights and responsibilities are more important to me than what the legal recognition of same-sex relationships is called?
Agree
I think we should treat rights and responsibilies separately, not as an all or nothing package deal with optional confetti.
Couples should only get legal rights and responsibilities if they live together?
Disagree
You should be able to nominate who you chose to visit you in hospital, raise your children when you die, benefit from your pension etc, whether they are a partner or not, but only co-habitees should be able to inherit the right to stay in shared housing.
Lesbians and gay men will only get equality if we are able to marry?
Disagree
Marriage is an messy legal institution with an ugly history, it has never done anything for equality and it leaves the State able to change the conditions without consulting those who are already married or gaining their consent.
Lesbian and gay couples should be able to marry just like heterosexual couples?
Agree
Marriage should not exist in its current form, but it should be possible to sue religious institutions for discrimination in any non-legal marriages that continue, because it would be fun.
The name ‘marriage’ is unimportant to me?
Disagree
It has negative associations because of the institution's history and current form. I don't think we will be able to reclaim it for a long time (after its abolition).
Civil Unions are inferior to marriage?
Disagree
They lose some of the crap associated with marriage and that's good. I am yet to be convinced that they lose enough of it, though.
Legal recognition of lesbian and gay relationships is less important than being accepted in society?
Agree
We need legal equality in employment and housing law etc, but attitudes change slower and have more day to day effect
The name marriage is important for heterosexuals to accept lesbian and gay relationships?
Disagree
I see acceptance anyway for same and opposite sex unmarried couples. Those people who care about marriage[1] should be ignored until they grow up or die out.
No relationship should have legal rights and responsibilities attached to it?
Agree
You should be able to opt in to certain legal rights, but most relationship stuff is and should be independent of this.
Edit: [1] By which I mean people who find marriage necessary in order to respect other people's relationships, not necessarily people who care about their own marriage
thoughtful
(no subject)
- Lesbian and gay couples should be able to marry just like heterosexual couples? Agree: Marriage should not exist in its current form, but it should be possible to sue religious institutions for discrimination in any non-legal marriages that continue, because it would be fun.
*giggle* I think I disagree with you on this point - religions should have the freedom to be bigoted if they want - but I would still giggle if it got decided the other way and they got sued for it :-)(no subject)
I think a lot of the problem stems from the fact that in this country, there is too much of a link between the religious and legal ceremonies. A religious ceremony is not a 'right', but I think a legal marriage / partnership should be, for consenting adults. It may be slightly better if Britain were to adopt the system of some European countries, where legal marriage is only performed by the state and any religious ceremony is quite separate and has no legal weight of its own.
(no subject)